Haiti final post: Mountains Beyond Mountains

A month ago I was finishing up 10 days in Haiti.  The immediate emotion that comes to mind is "overwhelmed." On our last day, the 4 of us were lounging on a beach in Cap Haitian, relaxing and reflecting on all that we had seen.  The nice beach was in huge contrast to the sad state of poverty and destruction that covers much of the country.  Simply thinking about the country was painful in itself.  I didn't even want to go into the city anymore, encountering people everywhere asking for money.  Most of this was due to the blitz-nature of our trip.  We never stayed in the same place twice in a row, constantly on the move, not pausing long enough to truly build deep relationships.

I've begun to discover what it means to serve a place like Haiti.  The statistics are overwhelming.  The situation is disheartening.  Hope seems to be fading.  However, within every organization we visited, we encountered a group of people who had dedicated their lives to change.  People who were motivated by the simple fact that God cares for these people.  God's preference is for the poor.  However, they were also motivated by the fact that their calling is to work towards a better Haiti.  They were all willing to make the necessary sacrifices and fight the necessary political battles.

"Mountains Beyond Mountains," is a book by Tracy Kidder, which follows the life of Dr. Paul Farmer.  Dr. Farmer is a doctor who has dedicated his life to eradicating infectious diseases around the world.  His quest began in Haiti, working in the mountains.  Although he travels around the world seeking out new locations to fight disease, he admits that he feels truly alive while serving patients one on one in the mountains of Haiti (295).  Like I witnessed in all those working for a better Haiti, the motivation is reflected in the title of the book, from a Haitian proverb, which basically states that beyond mountains, there are more mountains.  To me, this expresses the weight of the task and the calling ahead.

Discipleship, to follow Christ's call in this world, is a calling into a difficult world that asks you to take on the mountains.  Examining the plight of Haiti or any area of need is a call to action.  Kidder summed it up through reciting a Haitian proverb "Bondye konn bay, men li pa konn separe," or "God gives but doesn't share (79)." God's grace is abundant and free.  However, we are called to respond through giving, through sharing with places in need.

The airport in Port-Au-Prince was packed and lively when we arrived for our flight to Miami.  The long line out front was a unique mix of travelers.  However, what stood out, quite comically, were the church groups with matching t-shirts.  All of these shirts were, of course, brand new (you can bet poor Haitian kids loved seeing that), with fancy slogans on them about "saving Haiti," or "helping people," "loving God and others," etc..

I would say I'm not one to stereotype but I'd be lying.  Having gone on mission trips before, knowing the culture of many international trips, and through studying the message of these shirts, I had a good sense about what the general ethos of these groups was about: Come for a week to move some stones, build some houses, maybe tell people why they should believe in Jesus Christ, then pack up and fly back home with some souvenirs you bought from a gift shop.

This needs to stop.  The sad state of what "mission (hijacked term to begin with) trips" have become is a chance to show up and share some "goodness" with people in another country, then fly home with some sadness about the people, maybe say a prayer, then never engage the topic again.  There is a broad ranging lack of transformation in these trips.  There is a lack of understanding of the importance of building relationships and staying tuned to the larger implications of the trip and the country involved.

Christ was pretty radical in His interaction with the poor.  Going to meals with them, healing them, telling them they will inherit the kingdom of God.  These interactions are steeped in developed, transformative relationships, not in brief moments of giving.  So we too are called to encounter the poor places of this world.

Sacrifice a part of yourself, be transformed by the relationship, engage the larger systemic issues, and seek the next mountain to cross.  They are often right out your back door.  And you don't even need to buy a new t-shirt.

Photo by Cole Smothers

Haiti Day 9: The Silent Citadel

The thing about heat in the Caribbean is that it starts EARLY.  We'd wake up at 6am, and by the time we're dressed and ready to go, it's already sunny and sweltering.  It actually eases up as the day goes on.  Today, we got up early in the hopes to get to our site early.  La Citadelle was our target, one of the most famous landmarks in Haiti.

La Citadelle was built between 1805 and 1820 by the newly freed republic of Haiti in order to fortify the country from a possible attack from the French.  The thing is...they never attacked!  La Citadelle was basically useless for all these years.  We also didn't quite understand how building a fort so far away from water and the city would be preventative, but what do we know!  It took us about an hour to drive out to the site.  As we drew near, we came upon a small town with roads of cobblestone.  We bought tickets to go up to the Citadel, as well as to ruins of an Imperial Palace, along with a local guide.  Next we preceded to drive UP the cobblestone road, up the mountain, towards La Citadelle at the top.

We park near where we will walk the rest of the way up, only to be greeted by hordes of Haitians attempting to sell us their wares.  Being quite used to this by now, we push our way through them to begin our walk.  Along the way we begin to notice that a group of boys around our ages have decided to join us. They are pretty silent, however, we realize they've each chosen one of us to talk to, and single us out whenever they can.  The guy that talks to me speaks very good english and is being friendly.  Suspicious of his motives, I try to be as friendly as possible, while maintaining boundaries.  At some point the guy picks up on it and tells me that we're just talking and there is "no obligation" to give anything.  To be continued on that one...

Soon we see La Citadelle through the clearing.  Majestic and towering, it appears as if its scraping the sky.  We see the tracks of the aquaduct along the way up, where water was sent to the palace down below.  Once we arrive at the front gates, our tagalongs back off and we enter with our guide.  It appears as if we're the only ones in the VAST expanse of the place.  There is also little to no staff/security/anything, which leaves us the freedom to walk everywhere.












There are tons of cannons throughout the place, many set up facing windows.  We learned that most of these were stolen from imperial ships.  Beyond that, cannonballs were also littered throughout the place.


Once we emerge in the courtyard, we finally see a couple of school groups that have gathered there.  We continue upwards to the very top, only to be greeted by one of the most majestic views I have ever experienced in my travel.  Views that no picture can do justice.  I'm sure many of you can relate to that sentiment.  We felt like we could reach up and brush the layer of clouds above our heads.  We could see for miles into the valley, with the shadow of clouds upon the land.  We could see smoke rising from houses where charcoal was being made.  We could hear the faint sound of drums in the distance, most likely from voodoo ceremonies.  Needless to say, it was a gorgeous moment.

The fresh air and breeze at the top was extremely refreshing, particularly after the time we had spent in the smoke and dust filled city.  It was also strange to think of the beauty from so far away, knowing that things weren't so down below.  The peace we felt up there is momentary, a breath of fresh air.  However, no one can stay up here forever.  You must descend the mountain at some point.  Moses took Joshua upon the mountain to gaze upon the Holy Land.  Their moment of fresh air was also brief.  They both knew the trials that lied ahead.  The struggles, the pain, the death.

Eventually we walked back down, only to be greeted by our sojourning friends.  The one who had singled me out smiled and began talking to me again.  I continued my suspicious interaction.  Towards the bottom he began to tell me that while I was up there he was with his kid in the hospital and really needed some help, particularly in the form of money from me.  After being in this country for so long, after getting a read on this guy, and especially after being at BSM this year, I have discovered the truth that such statements, such experiences, are simply COMPLICATED.  Never an easy answer.  However, they always point to the system, the root.  This is where action must be taken.  This is why guilt can never rest on the rejection of these moments.  It's amazing for those who can rise above.  However...it's complicated.  In this particular situation, especially given that this was obviously a tourist trap, I turned him down and walked away from him fast, which seemed to do the trick.

As we drove back down the mountain in the Pathfinder, we had a moment where the brakes started to smoke!  Our driver stopped to let them cool as we dug into the remainder of our packed lunches (which had lasted us MANY meals over our time).  These consisted of every sort of combination of tortillas, bread, tuna, fresh avocados, fresh mangoes, oreos, nutter butters, and granola bars.

At the bottom, we walked around the Imperial Palace, which had largely been destroyed in a quake years ago.  It was spread out pretty far and we could faintly make out where things used to be.








Of particular interest was a large old tree of obvious importance to the house.  We were told this was the "tree of justice," a place where people were hanged.  An interesting comparison to the "tree of life." Both testaments to the power of nature, to hold life and death.  This palace in particular, was also a clear example of the triumph of nature, of eternity, of God.  The remains of this place were largely grown over.  A stream trickled down through the yard, into the city below.  A reminder that our most powerful structures can not stand up to the test of nature.



We finished our time there and preceded to ride onward to what would be our retreat house for a 24 hour period, Cormier Place, a local beach resort.  Supporting the local economy is never a bad thing!  We arrive and learn theres only one room left that 5 of us must squeeze into.  We take it!  The place, however, is strangely quiet.  We would learn that this is due to UN soldiers who have made this their temporary home while they work in the city.  Interesting.

We take this time, once again, to breathe, to soak in all that we've seen.  We take this time to rest, to figure out how we're going to tell our stories once we return home.  We feel like we've been in the country forever.  We also know we've got a lot to share upon our return.

Haiti Day 8: A long trek across the country

Woke up with the sunrise on the roof of Trinity House to the sound of roosters down below.  We once again hopped in our bus, surprised to see it was driven by our NASCAR driver friend!  As expected, we bolted at high speeds through the mountains.  High speed isn't so fun with tight turns and steep inclines!

Once back in Port-Au-Prince we had to make a quick restroom pit stop.  Unfortunately, often the only option in the city is to find a good spot on the street.  So that's what we did!  As 4 of us were doing our business on a wall, a man comes walking up behind us, obviously not Haitian (my guess is he's from Jersey :) ), and in good english starts ranting about how Jesus is in charge of the US and not that "a-hole" Obama, etc..  He was obviously a little out of it.  A very strange moment.

Finally we get to the airport in time to say farewell to Jarrett, Franklin, and Dan as they trek back home.  Clark, Berry, Cole, and myself head to the domestic terminal for our flight to Cap Haitien.  

The view from our tiny prop plane is gorgeous.  We see the miles of mountains below before finally emerging at the coastal city of Cap Haitien in the north.  It's a much smaller airport, and we don't have as much trouble this time around making our way out to catch our ride.  William will be our guide, a young recent college grad who arrives with our driver in a Pathfinder.  We find a way to all squeeze in the back as we make our way across town.

Cap Haitien is pretty gorgeous and runs at a much slower pace than Port-Au-Prince.  However, poverty is still obvious.  The city was also unaffected by the earthquake, however it looks similar, evidence to the power of poverty.  Part of our drive goes over a small river, where trash is piled up and houses are backed up against.  We stop and grab some grub before touring Meds and Food For Kids, the organization Clark's contact Jamie works with some.  Basically, they run a peanut processing plant, making delicious peanut butter in sealed packs that are distributed to malnourished kids.  It's a very intense process that employs Haitian workers and produces a lot.  

After dropping our stuff off at Jamie's place, we make our way across town to a cookout at a children's' home.  Along the way, we pick up Harold, a Haitian man living in the same compound as Jamie who works with an organization teaching farming.  Our drive takes us into the countryside, through forests of fruit trees and lots of open, flat space, something we hadn't seen much of yet.  The feel is completely different.  Eventually we arrive at the children's' home (I forget/cant find the name yet...working on it!).  As we enter the large compound, we see kids playing soccer and we are immediately offered hot dogs and snow cones.  Clark and Berry run off to play soccer while cole and I sit down to chat with some of the people sitting.  I meet the director (whose name I'm also searching for!), a young midwife nurse practitioner with incredible passion.  She spoke of her calling to this job after working in hospitals and seeing how kids are often left to die for one reason or another.  

We walk around the compound and begin to see how important this home believes it is for these kids to have a happy life.  There's a lot of room to run around, a playground, some animals and farming space, a clinic under construction, and lots of space for school and meeting.  We discover that the event for the cookout is celebration of being new to this site!  Berry and I join in on some basketball with the kids before we have to head out. 

Harold and his cook have prepared a wonderful meal for all of us back at the housing compound.  We eat delicious soup before calling an end to our long day.

I am beginning to feel very tired at this point in the trip.  Even though Cap Haitien is a little more laid back, the poverty is still real, the dust of the dirty roads are still real, the general mood is still real.  It's a lot to take in.  I begin to admire the energy and passion of those who have committed themselves to being present to so much pain.  Part of me had been needing some rest after my work at BSM this year and I had jumped into this trip and moved around every day.  This was also probably contributing to my tiredness.  However, I knew the next couple of days would leave much time for enjoyment, relaxation, and reflection.

Haiti Day 7: On down to Jacmel town

We pack up and say goodbye to the CODEP guesthouse before hopping in the back of another truck with all our stuff.  Once again, we've got great seats to view the countryside as we take off on the mountain roads.  We're heading south to Jacmel (see a map on an earlier post).  Along the way, we stop to see a final CODEP project, this one much further along than the others.  The process of reforestation in this particular area was extremely lush.  Under the tree cover, we also noticed several fish ponds, another CODEP project developed to help provide sustainability and income.  We also saw the homes of many of the Haitian CODEP employees.

Our crew then packed in the seats and back of a pickup truck to travel the final hour or so down to Jacmel (on the southern coast).  As we approach from the mountains, we witness a beautiful view of a town on the water.  It's a much smaller city than Port-Au-Prince and feels a lot more laid back.  I begin to notice that there is much more quake damage in this area than Port-Au-Prince, if not just more concentrated.

We pulled in at Trinity house, a partner of St. Josephs Home for Children, who we visited earlier.  As we pull up, kids are already playing soccer in the road outside.  They all come and greet us one by one, though it's a little obvious they were made to do so :).  Regardless, we feel very welcomed as we put all our stuff in the room we'll be crashing in, take a look around Trinity House, and then head back to our driver for a tour around Jacmel.

Clark is somewhat familiar with the city.  As we drive, he is looking outside for shops and streets worth visiting.  We settle on what looks like an artist alley.  It's pretty quiet and not a whole lot is open.  We visit with a French lady's studio before heading across the street to a hotel for a drink.  We then walk around the town.  I feel very strange.  The city is very quiet and we are continually followed by a few vendors trying to draw us into their stores.  We see quake damage and tent cities, much like the ones in Port-Au-Prince, all over the town.  It becomes obvious to me that the quake has DESTROYED the commerce of this town.  Once a bustling hub for artists and trade, now a city with a lot of tension as it tries to get along as the shell of what it once was.  We make our way to the beach front for another drink and some sugarcane.  It's nice to be able to gaze out over the water, a scene that rarely changes.

Upon returning to Trinity House, we immediately head back out for a nearby swimming hole.  The location is a cove nearby where a bunch of the kids are already swimming.  They love having us in there to throw them around, much like I used to.

We have dinner on our own back at the house, followed by some time to explore and learn a little bit.  The kids that live there are pretty much all ages, up to 21, which is when they graduate (although some that age are still around).  Some of the younger kids from St. Joseph's have also been relocated here as they work to rebuild the Port-Au-Prince site.  Trinity House also functions as a school for the neighborhood kids among many other things as detailed on their site.

That night, we would be graced with a performance by the infamous Resurrection Dance Theater, a group out of St. Joseph's that has toured ALL over the place throughout the years, including places near you in the US this Fall!  Drums carried the dancing as the dancers would come out of the side room to perform their numbers.  We were blown away by the performances: boys with incredible gifts bearing their all.  Each dance told a story of Haiti, from the slave revolt to the modern issues with poverty.  By far the most powerful moment for us was when one of the dancers came running out in a frantic, yet beautiful dance.  He was moving so fast you could hardly realize that he was missing an arm.  His dance carried the weight of his story with a joy of simply being who he is and expressing himself through dance.  The end of the performance featured time for each dancer to show off some moves before they finally got the entire crowd in on the action for a final dance number.

Immediately following the performance, we were led into a side room where all the boys were proudly displaying their artwork.  Through the help of big-time artists who come by to teach, the boys had some amazing pieces and were very adamant salesmen!  I walked around admiring and telling them I wasn't buying until I came across the youngest boy in the room, named Lulu, who stood silently in the corner.  Knowing he probably wasn't getting much business for his pen drawings, I bend over and ask him how much.  "13" he says.  Thinking he meant "goudes (Haitian currency about 40 to the dollar)" and knowing I only had US $1 bills with me, I feel confident in giving up a dollar to pay much more than was expected.  I smile, give him the money and take his drawing, what I see as the countryside post-quake.

As I tell Clark about my purchase he says, "you gave him $1?  I'm pretty sure when he said $13 he meant American dollars!" I was shocked.  Did I seriously just rip off a Haitian orphan?  With the help of interpretation via Clark, I go back to pay a more respectable price to the young kid.

That night, we all bring our beds up to the roof of Trinity House, which provides a gorgeous view of the ocean, mountains, and city down below.  We can hear commotion in tent cities near us.  There is a gentle breeze throughout the night.  A breeze that we can only hope brings some new hope and new life into this town so rocked by disaster.

Day 6: Reflections

That Monday after our CODEP hike, we'd stay at the guest house the rest of the day, to catch up on some rest.  I went out back to the beach with a few of the guys to swim and snorkel.  This was my first time snorkeling around coral.  I was blown away at the beauty down there.  It was a new world, a beauty that stands in contrast to the struggles of the country.  

Our group had a conversation that night about what we witnessed with CODEP, and the general NGO presence in Haiti.  From what we've encountered, these groups see it as their role to take care of the social ills of the country.  With the disarray of the government and disillusionment of the people, this is very understandable.  However, the struggles with this structure are many.  For one, there is no central organization, which leads to competition among these groups, attempting to deal with the issues their own way.  There is also the issue of establishing sustainability so that there is no constant dependency.  Some groups were tackling this better than others.  Regardless, the country is a long way from getting to this point.  The years of foreign influence have made this difficult as well.  So where does that leave us?  What can we do?

Theologically, this is the question of a public theology.  Is the role of the church to address the social ills of a country?  If so, is this done on its own power, or is there a role in speaking truth to those with the power to enact such change?  I'm of the firm belief that we are called to the latter.  Christ was a vocal advocate for those in need in the face of power.  The old testament tradition stands to this as well.  

However, its hard to conceptualize how to enact this in a country in such disarray as Haiti.  There is much to be done, and at the end of the day, being present with the people of the country and in relationship is often all that can be done.  This is the ministry all the groups we have witnessed stand to.  There is an immediacy to this ministry that is very important.  They stand up for immediate action instead of talk.  Something we could learn more from back home!  

Our ability to hope and speak up for these people is our calling as pastors and people of faith.  May we always strive to do so.

Pictures from the mountain hike

Pictures from our hike with CODEP (see previous post).  Many pictures courtesy of Franklin Golden and Cole Smothers.

The crew on our CODEP hike

Kids along the way

Homes

Farmer

The barren mountainside

Our path

The slow process of re-forestation

Berry and I from up high

Haiti days 5 & 6: Down the mountain

Leaving Port-Au-Prince can take a while.  For one, all the roads would make great settings for SUV commercials.  Traffic, dust, smog, and people selling stuff car window to window on the street make for quite a long trek.  Fortunately, our driver could have been a NASCAR driver as we would hit probably 90 miles an hour at the breakaways, horn blaring and people diving out of our way.

We left the city for the Leogane area, just south to southwest of Port-Au-Prince, on the edge of the mountains.  We would be working with CODEP, or Comprehensive Development Project, which is taking on a number of great initiatives in the mountains of Haiti, to help provide a self-sustainable living economy for the people that live there.  Clark had spent several months with this organization and was excited to see the progress they've made over the years.

Saturday night, we arrived at the CODEP guest house on the coast, a lovely place with a beach AND a washing machine (a very welcomed sight at this point). We learned a little about the project and ate a delicious pumpkin soup dinner before calling it a night.

The next morning began early as we packed for a night in the mountains and jumped in the back of the truck as it drove up the steep mountain slope.   Being on the back, we were able to take in the gorgeous views of the valleys down below.  Already, we felt as if we were in another world, coming from Port-Au-Prince.  The air was clear, there was hardly any traffic congestion, the quake damage wasn't so much visible.  However, we would soon learn what kind of damage the people of these mountains face as we gazed out at mountains once full of trees.

Our first stop was at a church service, a church where Clark had lived and helped teach.  The church was a partner with CODEP.  We were ushered to the front of the room, where around 50 or so Haitians were gathered.  Clark did his best to introduce our group in Kreyol, and we sat through the service, not understanding much beyond communion, offering, and the tunes of a few hymns.   We were a little surprised that service only lasted an hour.  Our previous experience with third-world churches, as well as comments by Clark led us to believe that we'd be in church for the long-haul that day.  We would later learn that BECAUSE they knew we would be there that Sunday, they prepared a SHORTER version for us Americans.  They would continue "their" service later on that afternoon.  Sure makes you feel silly!

After the service we joined the congregants for a coffee hour and some attempts at communication.  We also checked out the place Clark had stayed when he worked there, a house that had moved from two stories to one during the quake.  Seeing quake damage even in the sparsely populated mountains was very interesting.

Further up the mountain, we began our hike (the 7 of us, CODEP director John, and several "animators"-Haitian locals with responsibility over reforesting plots, funded by CODEP.  The hike featured gorgeous views of the landscape.  Soon we would see the process of re-foresting in its prime.  After a mile or so of crumbly, dry ground, we came up to a heavily forested area, one of the first CODEP projects.  The process in a nutshell: build ramps with grass to catch rainwater, when mulch gathers plant Eucalyptus trees to nutrify soil and provide tree cover, THEN fruit trees can be planted to provide sustainability and income.  The results were astonishing.  Simply looking at the difference between a barren and forested landscape was proof enough of the effectiveness of the project.  Further, we learned that the focus is on educating the residents of the countryside on these methods and encouraging them NOT to move to cities, but rather to sustain themselves where they are located.  Here's a map of the area we were in (pictures in the next post):

After around 5-6 miles of hiking, we arrived at a home of a CODEP partner deep in the mountains.  This would be where we'd crash that evening.  I'd done a home stay before - a very humbling experience, as the hosts usually insist you stay in their rooms while they cram in another room.  This was no different in that regard.  However, somehow we ended up staying at the neighborhood MOVIE THEATER.  In between two houses was a sheltered area where a tv and huge sound system was set up.  Around 20 Haitian kids were gathered, where they had paid money to watch a series of low budget action flicks at super high volumes.  Us, tired from our massive hike, were ready to crash, around 9pm.  What are you gonna do...tell the gracious hosts to shut up?  We did note the bitter irony of the fact that the local Haitians were all glued to a TV while the Americans were the ones hiking all day and going to bed early.

We finished our hike early the next day, coming back down the mountain for pickup.  Our ride back to the CODEP guesthouse took us through fields of corn crops and banana trees, lush lowlands.  Its hard to imagine a country so full of wonderful food exports suffering so much.  Potential is enormous, yet as we had seen, the years have not been good to the countryside.  Deforestation and poverty in the mountains sends people to the city, where the suffering is magnified.  

It runs down from the mountains like the rain.

Pictures from the first half

Some pictures courtesy of our fellow filmmaking travelers Franklin Golden and Cole Smothers (more on the way):

Common scene: busy market with crumbled buildings behind

More quake damage

The UN doing what they do best: sit there with guns

The crew (l-r): Clark, Me, Jarrett, Berry, Franklin, Dan, Cole (taking the picture)

Kids in City Soleil

Another common scene: several square miles of tents

Streets of Port-Au-Prince

Faces of Haiti

More faces

Day 4: Remembering

Great mountains surround the city of Port-Au-Prince.  At night, the lights of houses in the mountains look like tall skyscrapers from far away.  Like skyscrapers, the wealth ascends the heights.  The higher up the mountain you drive, the more expensive the land.  The wealth inequality is quite large in Haiti, and those with the money like to be secluded up high, a metaphor for how things play out in that country.

We journeyed into the mountains to visit a cultural immersion organization started by Carla, an American woman, and her husband called "N a Sonje (we will remember) Foundation."  Her, along with 4 Haitian boys about my age gave us a presentation on Haitian history.  They told a story in dramatic fashion about a peaceful Haiti pre-colonization and the evils brought upon it following occupation.  They spoke about slavery in the country and the revolt that led to the first successful freed slave republic in the early 1800's.  Finally they spoke of the lead-up to modern times, where continued foreign investment and occupation continues to dominate politics in the country.

The presentation was extremely guilt inducing, particularly for those of us in the position of power, coming from the tradition known for colonization.  After hearing the presentation, we struggled to find anything really helpful from the presentation.  The problem wasn't a matter of factuality.  The reality of colonization and occupation is a great tragedy to Haiti and continues to be so.  The need for people to acknowledge such things is also valuable, in order to keep perspective of the challenges the nation faces.  However, I realized this presentation lacked envisioning futures and possibilities.  If guilt is going to be the mechanism used to acknowledge history, it must be followed with envisioning a way forward, a way to work together for a new Haiti.  This is something that we ALL must work together on.  Realizing the problems we wrought upon the country and seek out new methods of communication, bringing the right voices into the conversation and seeking out what is best for the country instead of what WE think is best for the country.

We were impressed at the work Carla's foundation was doing in the community, helping children become educated, along with taking grasp of their history as a means to move forward.  She has obviously become a very beloved part of the community.

Carla also gave us her thoughts on post-earthquake Haiti, telling us how she believes the shock is finally wearing off and people are beginning to really feel the effects of the quake personally.  She spoke of higher tensions, pain, and problems in the city, magnified by the slow crawl of relief efforts.  In my short time, I strangely felt this tension.  For the most part, life was carrying on in the poverty stricken city of Port-Au-Prince.  However, it was obvious that the way forward has become harder than ever and the path forward is murky.  There were moments we did not feel welcomed as white Americans, which is understandable and not unusual.  Yet another reminder of the importance of envisioning possibility together.

May we remember as well.

Day 3: Wings

Our third day in Haiti took us to the site of St. Joseph's Home for Boys in Port-Au-Prince.  Many of you out there are familiar with their organization, or their dance troupe, the Resurrection Dance Theater, touring to a city near you this Fall!

For those of you who don't know about them, the home started in 1985 as a response to young boys stranded on the streets of Port-Au-Prince, or boys forced into brutal house servitude.  They have 20 something boys at the Port-Au-Prince location, and even more in Jacmel.  However, after the quake, this is what remains of the Port-Au-Prince house:

The several story building collapsed, killing a couple friends, but none of the kids.  One of the directors of the program, Bill Nathan, was on the roof of the building when it collapsed.  Here's what happened to him.  Now, he tours with the Resurrection Dance Theater, promoting St. Joseph's and telling his story.  We had a chance to hang out with him and hear his drumming skills.

Younger boys from St. Joseph's have been moved to the Jacmel "Trinity House," while the older boys and some graduates of the home are living at a rented house next door, carrying on the home and assisting in clearing the lot/rebuilding:

That day, we also got to visit "Wings of Hope," another house of St. Joseph's which cares primarily for disabled children.  They had around 39 kids (may be off a bit) at their site, all receiving fantastic medical care and attention.  They even had a fat ol' chocolate lab running around the house, giving the kids some extra love!  Given how Haiti often responds to people with disabilities, as second class citizens, it was so beautiful to see a place where they are cared and love for as the children of God that they are.  The wings have truly set them free.

On the way back from HOM that day, we stopped by a tent city location on what used to be a golf course.  We walked around on the higher elevated part and looked down on the vast expanse of tents down below.  This was one of the more shocking parts of post-quake Haiti, seeing every possible public space in the cities taken up by tents.  Even statues and historical landmarks are often covered up (like the statue to the left) because people need space to live.  At the rate rebuilding is going in the cities (VERY slowly), people could be in these tents for YEARS.  Just imagine how difficult this must be, especially over time as more and more people move into the city and all must readjust.

That evening, our crew reflected on the ministries we've witnessed thus far, comparing their approaches. HOM has a larger scale view: building churches and houses for as many people as possible, to raise the quality of living for a part of the city.  St. Joseph's view is smaller, aimed at transforming individuals who can grow up to be agents of change in the city.  Both have elements that could be challenging to deal with, issues of sustainability, funding, stewardship, etc.  However, among some critiques we drummed up that night, we kept coming back to the admiration of enactment.  Some amazing people are committed to working in Haiti to shape areas of great poverty and despair.  One of our group members reminded us of a phrase he heard before in regards to mission organizations that may be difficult to deal with: "this is what it means to be in relationship."

The work these groups are doing in Haiti should call us to action.  They should invite us into relationship with them and with organizations in our own communities.  They are a reminder that the gospel of Christ is an ACTIVE gospel, that is boldly serving the world beyond its own means.  This work is never perfect, in fact its often messy.  However, it's rooted in love.

May these wings set us free.

Haiti part 2: my family set me free

I really had no idea why exactly we were going on this trip for sure.  I did know I wanted to experience the country and learn how to tell stories of the place.  I knew I wasn't going for "relief work" in the traditional sense, of Americans showing up to "help out" the work projects, not much focusing on everything else.  In order to tell a story, you need context.  Thankfully our trip has had much context, the bad, the good, and everything in between.

Our first fun cultural experience was Thursday night the 19th when we went to see the Haitian musical sensation RAM at the famous Hotel Oloffson.  We had a fantastic night of great food and dancing in the restaurant at an old, plantation style hotel that has collected much history in Port-Au-Prince.  A highlight of the night was when all of a sudden Win Butler and Regine Chassagne of Arcade Fire took the stage with RAM!  I learned Regine was of Haitian descent.

They of course, played this song:



"Haiti" by Arcade Fire"
Haiti, mon pays
Wounded mother I'll never see
Ma famille set me free
Throw my ashes into the sea

Mes cousins jamais nes
Hantent les nuits de Duvalier
Rien n'arrete nos espirits
Guns can't kill what soldiers can't see

In the forest we are hiding
Unmarked graves where flowers grow
Hear the soldiers angry yelling
In the river we will go

Tous les morts-nes forment une armee
Soon we will reclaim the earth
All the tears and all the bodies
Bring about our second birth

Haiti, never free
N'aie pas peur de sonner l'alarme
Tes enfants sont partis
In those days their blood was still warm
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We stayed in a hotel in town that night...supporting the tourism industry which is in great need!

Haiti part 1: Something is always burning

Five pastors, one student, and one documentary filmmaker boarded a plane to Haiti early Wednesday morning, August 18th, in Miami.

I wasn't sure what to expect upon landing.  Based on media coverage and word of mouth, it sounded like Haiti would be in complete chaos - rubble all over the streets, looting going on everywhere, nothing functioning as it did before.  Although this turned out to be far exaggerated, I came to discover many of the chaos in Haiti has been present long before the quake ever hit.

We come out of the airport pushing our way through guys trying to make a dime by helping us move our bags.  One of them finally fools us by telling us he's with the "airport" and needs to take the luggage cart back.  We roll with it.  When we get in our "tap tap" (Haitian taxis, basically truck beds with roofs), we begin to ride through the city, witnessing some of the poorest parts of town.  As we make our way towards Blanchard, we see homes along the way.  Life looks similar to what I've witnessed rural or poor areas are like in other countries (Turkey, China, Guatemala).  However, this time there is the added element of tents, blue and white, every open space you look across.  As we travel down the dirt roads we smell burning and notice riverbeds piled full of paper, styrofoam, and plastic.  There is a black smoke emitting from them.  Our guide nonchalantly says, "yeah, something is always burning around here." This is what happens when there is no infrastructure for such things.

We meet up with our first hosts, a mission known as Haiti Outreach Ministries.  Similar to a group I worked with in Mexico (Constructores Para Christo), these guys are focused on building houses, churches, medical facilities, and schools within communities in the poorest parts of Port Au Prince (Blanchard, City Soleil, and Repatriote).  They are doing hard work through the help of volunteers, employing several Haitians along the way.  However, I have some misgivings about their evangelism approach.  They also seem to be disengaged from political engagement, something I assume to be a theological standpoint of the ministry.  I would come to realize however, that this disengagement runs extremely deep throughout the country.

The next day (August 19th) we would tour Port-Au-Prince.  Stores and houses along the street stood beside massive piles of rubble and collapsed buildings.  The lack of progress in cleanup was truly evident.  I asked our guide why and realized a lot of it was due to government roadblocks, lack of initiative to make a massive effort.  Also, I learned a lot of aid money had been used in consultation, as those looking to rebuild were seeking ways to prevent future damage.  The cost is great indeed.







A very haunting view of the rubble was when we visited the national cathedral.  What was once a gorgeous structure standing as a monument to the city is now a massive pile of rubble.  We walked into the structure along with a few Haitian kids, hoping to serve as our "tour guides." The roof had completely collapsed.  The giant stained glass windows were cracked and shattered.  Columns had fallen.

It's funny to me how the largest buildings, built as testaments of strength, are often the first ones to fall.  And when they do, they make a statement. I got caught up in emotion when I realized that giant piles of rubble mean that they haven't been moved since the quake.  This means that there still could be bodies under where I was standing.  Bodies that may remain there for months to years, in their new tomb.

We went to a large market near City Soleil that morning, a massive enterprise of people, fruit, clothing, medicines, meat, you name it.  We learned that this market had been used as a place to buy and sell slaves back in the day.  Haiti was the first nation of freed slaves, due to a revolution in the early 1800's.  However, the 200 years following were hardly "free" for those of you up with your history of the nation.  This is still the case.  The damage of the quake is horrifying.  Rebuilding is slow.  However, the true tragedy is the continued slavery to foreign powers and the cultural nihlism this has embedded in the country.  The lack of political progress and hope.  The hope from this quake is that these deeper issues will be realized and the slow, long journey to true independence and peace may be found.

Something is always burning.

To Haiti

I'm a few hours away from my flight to Miami, where I will be joining a small group of pastors/peers/friends for a 10 day excursion to Haiti.  I was approached about this opportunity earlier in the summer.  Realizing the unique nature of this trip and the opportunity as a transition between BSM and seminary, I decided to join along.

Our goal is to embody the love of Christ in our interactions in Haiti.  We will be traveling with Haiti Outreach Ministries mostly around Port Au Prince.  We will be connecting with a few orphanages connected to the ministry, as well as doing some physical labor/earthquake rebuilding.

Like any international trip of this sort, there is always a danger in going into a foreign place such as Haiti with a vision to "save" the place.  Cultural barriers must be acknowledged and respected.  Therefore, we are approaching this trip with the understanding that we are going to learn stories, to experience the people, and to bring their stories back, speaking up for the situation in Haiti when we return home.

I'll do my best to keep my trip logged here, but due to the lack of internet access, this may not happen very readily.

Thank you all for your prayers and support!

transition

The dancer moved swiftly through the room as the singer belted out the chorus "God is already there..."

I was nearly in tears at one of my final services at Broad Street Ministry witnessing a moving expression of the Spirit.  Under normal circumstances, this would be merely a well done song and dance worship piece.  However, I knew the guy who was singing, I knew where he was coming from and what awaited him in the future.  That's a game changer.  In fact, telling the room of people gathered that "God is already there" is a pretty bold statement.  A lot of pain exists at BSM...
from people on the margins of society,
from people discriminated due to sexual orientation,
from people just struggling to make ends meet,
from people feeling all alone in the city,
from artists just vying to express themselves and make a living,
from recovering addicts,
from wealthy people figuring out what to do with their life.

I've always known this, but in my final weeks I've been hypersensitive to the weight of it all.  Particularly because I know this pain exists in every city, in every place.  And I know the religious landscape often runs away from this pain instead of taking it head on.  I know that MOST people in the situations mentioned above would never think of finding God "already there." Church is the last thing on their mind.  Community is the last thing on their mind.  I will be leaving BSM with a motivation to seek out this pain and move my future ministry setting to response.  I realize the importance of connecting to the community around, drawing in those who would never imagine being invited in to a "church" setting.  May we open our eyes.

I will be traveling to Haiti on Wednesday with a few pastor peer/mentors of mine.  We will be going to connect with organizations feeling pain.  We will be going to love, experience, and learn.  I'm pretty unaware of the weight of things I will experience, yet my motivation to be present in the midst of pain is obvious.  We aren't going to "save" Haiti.  We aren't going to "repair" or "work" for them.  We are going to be present, to be as little a footprint as possible.  We are going to learn stories and tell them; to be advocates for those in the midst of pain.  Besides...

God is already there.

Stay tuned for blog posts from Haiti.  Though I may not have internet access, I'll do my best to post what I jounal about during my time.  There will also be many pictures and stories to share.

Where in the world?

For those of you who don't know me, I am an AVID traveller.  I have a hard time staying in one location too long.  This month has been a month of travel, vacation, and exploration.

My first stop was Augusta, GA, my birthplace and home of my sponsor church, Reid Memorial Presbyterian.

"Home" is a very interesting concept, relative to the individual.  I admit, I often feel most at home while on the road, visiting friends that know me well.  I find it difficult to tie down this concept to one particular location.  Even Augusta has become a different place for me at this point in life.  Family and a few friends remain as my draw to home, but beyond that, I'm left seeking out other friends and experiences I can consider home as well.  Where is home for you?

One thing I LOVE about home is the lake.  We take our boat up on occasion to the lake to escape.  Floating out in the middle of nowhere on glassy smooth water is a GREAT way to clear the head after being in a city for so long.  Since I've been back I've felt much more centered and full of energy.  I credit a lot of it to being able to clear my head and relax in moments like these.

Amidst my inability to remain stagnant, I received a very welcoming reception at my home church.  I was greeted very warmly by people I have grown up with and people I barely know.  There is a clear love and appreciation for me and my work, despite my inability to be present to them.  This means a lot whether they realize it or not.

After some time in ATL and a wedding, I was off to Presbyterian Triennium at Purdue University in Indiana.  I was a small group leader as well as booth facilitator for Broad Street Ministry.

The theme was "Such a time as this," based of the Esther story.  What was driven home was the importance of standing up for our beliefs on behalf of others, despite the risks we may face.  We are guided and supported by God as was Esther when she stood up for her people.  This theme brought up many raw stories in my small group, stories about being too afraid to stand up for someone and not being stood up for.  I was reminded of how much pain high school youth carry with them and don't often have opportunities to express or share with others.

I was surprised at the openness of youth to come up to our BSM booth at the exhibit hall.  When I went to those things, I would go straight for the "free stuff," not even caring about what was being exhibited.  I had youth from all over the nation really interested in the life and work of BSM.  There was a lot of desire to do unique mission trips, something I don't remember as fondly from my youth.  I'm hoping this is a trend that is staying!

My favorite quote: "Is it true that you guys are a 'church for hipsters' (loose quote from a news article about bsm we give out)?  If so, I think I'd like to go there!" I was like...um...in some ways, yes!

Even though I'm an extreme extrovert, I was WORN OUT by the end of this week - a lot of talking!

So here I am, back at BSM for the time being, in my last month :(

I'll keep you all updated more as I make the home sprint and begin to make my final evaluations.  peace!

My Toy Story 3 reflections (spoilers!)

Just got back from seeing Toy Story 3, and my face is officially rocked off.  It totally lives up to the hype, so don't think that hearing too much about it will ruin your experience!

I feel led to give a little theological reflection on the movie so feel free to read ahead, but BEWARE, i'm throwing out spoilers left and right.  I highly encourage you to SEE THE MOVIE first!  Seriously go see it.  I'm not responsible for ruining the movie for you!  You've been warned!
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ok we're safe (granted I know some of you will ignore my warning and read on!).

To me, this movie is structured around a theology of belonging.  The toys belong to Andy, to their owner.  They bear his mark (woody and buz's shoes).  This means they have a responsibility to be there for Andy no matter what.  It's not a perfect metaphor, because Andy is in no means perfect and sovereign.  Andy also grows up over time.  However, I do believe in a God that suffers and experiences life along with us.  In this way, we belong to God and one another.

Andy has to leave, to go to college, leaving the toys behind.  This moment expresses itself early on when the toys are coming to grips with the fact that they are no longer being played with.  Are they not loved anymore?  The toys are left to fend for themselves, eventually ending up at a day care center (kind of on accident).

The main antagonist is introduced at this day care center - an evil stuffed bear who was lost by his owner and ended up at this day care - taking over with a mob-like structure.  Out of a sense of loss and abandonment, this bear was turned to evil (out of the circumstances that shaped him).

Escaping this facility requires the relationships the main toys have to one another and the guiding thought of their belonging to Andy.  This journey eventually leads them to a confronting of mortality in the garbage smelter.  In the face of their demise, they still recognize their loyalty to one another.

Through this adversity and a miracle, the gang makes it back to Andy.

The true power (and tearjerking) of this movie emerges in the final scene as Andy's packed car is ready to go to college.  He (through the cunning of Woody) takes the box of the gang of toys to a little girl's house.  Then, in a moment that sums up the full experience of being a child of God, Andy plays with each toy as he introduces them to the little girl, naming them one by one.  His love for each and every one of them is evident as he passes them along to someone he is confident will take care of them and love them as he did (Take care of my sheep).  Andy does not abandon those he loves.  He acknowledges their value and passes them on.  This process is much greater than he imagined, made evident in his hesitation to give away Woody.  However, he knows its the right thing to do.

This is who we are and what we are called to.  If we truly believe we are loved by God, we are called to pass that love on to one another, no matter what the time or circumstance.  We are never to give up on one another.   And at the end of the day, we have nothing left but gratitude, made evident in Andy's teary eyed "thanks guys" as he gets in his car to move along.

This year at BSM, I have experienced what it looks like for people who are neglected and abused by society to find a place where they experience belonging and love.  Our belonging is not determined by how we look or live.  It's a fact that we ALL hold in common - we are children of God and our love is made evident in our living.

We belong to one another and at the end of the day should have nothing but gratitude for one another.  This gratitude means that in the face of great adversity we can gift each other with the presence of others, with community, especially down to the most neglected members of our society.

Thanks Guys.

update

There's a phrase said around here that church doesn't "stop" in the summertime like it does in many congregations.  I understand the sentiment.  Most institutions seem to place everything on hold for the summertime, as if ministry does not take place during the hottest days of the year, as if ministry takes place at the beaches and pools of the world for those who can enjoy such vacation.

Many of our guests at BSM don't have the luxury of "stopping" for the summertime.  In case you didn't realize, there is no summer vacation from homelessness!  If anything, things tend to pick up around here, as people seek a place to drop in during the heat of the day.  Not to mention the bursting out of the Youth Initiative, which draws in youth groups for weeklong mission experiences.

However, something must be said for the intentionality of sabbath time.  Although ministry never ceases, all people must find time for reprieve.  Things slow down a little around here in the summer.  Programs need time to re-assess, people need time to recharge.

As for me, I've been in an interesting state of recovery and re-discovery.  I'm recognizing that i'll be travelling for most of the next couple of months and my time at BSM and ASPC will be limited.  This is bitersweet indeed, but also compelling as I seek how I will continue to develop my pastoral identity at Union Presbyterian Seminary (just changed their name today!).  More wrap-up reflections to come...

In the meantime, I've been continuing the work of helping build community and developing our "open table" groups at BSM as a means for connecting one another.  It's hard work, but important work.  Discipleship emerges out of the relationships we build with one another.  This is the task we are called to.

living good news

BSM and ASPC (the places I'm working) were recently featured in Presbyterians Today.  You can view the article HERE.  I share some reflections:

The root of the word "evangelism" is "good news." The breakdown of this world in our culture is centered around what exactly this "news" is.  For some, this news is an afterlife of paradise upon acceptance of Christ.  For others, this news is more centered on the present life, a hope for "better times." I don't believe Christians will ever come to consensus on what it means to "evangelize."  The word will continue to feed megachurches who use it solely to build numbers.  The word will also continue to scare away many people because of how it has been used coercively.

I believe the breakdown with "evangelism" occurs when we turn it into a mathematical formula, when we view it simply as methods to get people in the doors of church.  If we view the gospel as the good news, we must begin to view evangelism as relational.  By this, I mean good news becomes self-evident once we get to know each other authentically and once we make room for those on the margins of society to be known.  Christ is made evident in our relationships.

This view of evangelism has been the blessing and challenge of working at BSM and ASPC this year.  I have really enjoyed witnessing the opportunities given for people to know God and know one another more deeply.  People from every walk of life are given room to explore faith together creatively and authentically.  All are empowered to love and serve one another as Christ calls us.

However, the nature of this work is the challenge.  The first author in this article says "it isn't that hard." I would take issue to say that if it isn't hard, you aren't trying hard enough.  The work of "making visible the kingdom" requires a lot of sacrifice.  Creating room for relationship building means we must be willing to deal with those who are different from us.  Creating room for relationship calls us to make opportunities for people to have a sense of belonging in the work of God.

Both venues have been exploring this throughout the year.  They recognize the importance of breaking down barriers and drawing people in, yet constantly face the challenge of how to draw people into community.

It's not easy...but who ever said the work of God was?

Open Tables

"I've seen you serving food every time I'm here.  I had no idea you could write like that!"
-a member of our new "Arts and Culture" group at Broad Street Ministry said this past Wednesday night.  We were all in tears of laughter after hearing our friend Jack read us a hilarious poem addressed to his former boss.

BSM can be a large place, difficult to navigate and find community within.  As a result, I have been working with Erika and some key members of the community to create groups to address this issue.  We wanted to have opportunities for people to get to know one another on deeper levels, without creating cliques of like-minded people.  What resulted from conversations with members of the community was 3 groups: Movement, Arts and Culture, and Community Activism.  All three backed by fantastic people dedicated to giving room for relationship building and community empowerment.

Judging from the fun we had at the first instance of these groups on Wednesday, there is a definite place for these groups.  We saw glimpses of personality in people that was not often seen during normal events at BSM.  It's amazing what happens when you give room for creative expression.  People's walls come down just enough for transformation.  This is exceptionally true for those who have no other opportunities for creative expression, due to life circumstances, or people/groups in the past who have denied them and their gifts.  Many of us have experienced this, on both ends of the spectrum!

As "community trailblazer" this year, I have had many conversations with amazing people who have come through the doors of Broad Street Ministry.  I have had glimpses of their gifts and personality that are just bursting to be known.   I have heard stories about church and work environments where they are denied room to use these gifts.  I've been excited to see these groups take shape and I truly hope they continue to grow, giving people an opportunity to be known in the large community that is BSM.

Given that Jesus spent most of his time around a small group of disciples, its hard not to realize that Jesus was an advocate for close relationships in small groups.  This setting is where people become known and empowered to follow Christ out into the world.

May we continue to guide people to open tables where they can become known.

Broad Street Ministry: 5th Birthday

1 Corinthians 13:12 For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face.

Broad Street Ministry: 5th Birthday

landmarks

This coming Sunday is the 25th year anniversary of the Philadelphia Area Disc Alliance (i'm playing in their summer league this year).  Given that ultimate frisbee was invented in 1969, this is kind of a big deal (i'm sure only about 2 people reading this blog will even care about this).  However, my point is...

Landmarks are significant.

This past Sunday, the 16th, Broad Street Ministry celebrated its 5th year of existence.  Now this doesn't seem like much.  However, in the nonprofit world, this is a LONG time.  In the "experimental church" world, even longer.

Sunday was a wonderful celebration.  Even though I was loaded down with grunt work of making sure it ran smoothly, I was still able to experience the joyfulness of the day.  The BSM atmosphere was in full effect among the 400 gathered in that place (3x more than usual).  We had a smattering of every type of person possible, many who have been through the doors of BSM at some point in the past.  The worship service had the usual level of unruliness, fun, and joy, yet multiplied by the high energy in the room.  We had one guest, convinced he is Christ incarnite, who was jumping up and down, dancing to every song, making loud comments during service, and trying for another dose of the Communion.  We had more kids than usual, who found a spot near the back of the room to draw.  We had youth groups who have done mission trips at BSM in the past.  We had elders from churches who have given large sums of money in the past.  We had artist friends, homeless friends, dancer friends, social advocacy friends.  If you don't believe in a thing such as the "Holy Spirit," you may have been convinced otherwise on this day.

Oh yeah, and we had cake.

Capturing this event and the nature of BSM was a photobooth project by artist JJ Tiziou.  It was mostly as you imagine - a giant box where you make faces as the camera fires rapidly.  What emerged throughout the night was a HUGE smattering of people, faces.  The faces that showed up on the screen were ALL beautiful.  The magic was seeing everyone in their true light, whether they be a well-dressed businessman, or a worn down homeless person, they all looked beautiful.  This is the landmark we leave as a church: faces of those who the church encounters.  Faces that may not be captured by society.  Faces that Christ sees and loves.

Landmarks are significant.

Well, more like "watermarks," another significant moment this past week was a goal achieved by TheChurchisAlive blog.  We went with a pretty crazy idea: run an online fundraising drive for charity:water that would basically fund the building of a well in an impoverished area of the world.  We had been running this blog site as a home for those wishing to express a new energy and enthusiasm about the church and its ability to change the world around.  With the momentum we've been gaining, why not build a $5,000 well?

We did it.  In about 80 days we raised $5,250, enough to serve 262 families in a community.

It's amazing to me how people dedicated to giving of themselves can come together like this for such an amazing purpose.  Whether or not they did it for the "church" doesn't matter.  Hearts joined to meet a passion for the world in need.  We, as a churchisalive team, believe this to be the work of the gospel, work that doesn't quite translate these days in church.  Work that is often muffled by the bad media and pessimism about "church."

Our campaign started near the beginning of lent, hit a midpoint at East, and concluded right before Pentecost.  Our goal was met and we continue pressing onward.  I think that speaks for itself.

Landmarks are significant.

 

looking back - looking forward

"I'm so sorry," the young girl kept saying after hearing the words "this church just closed down."

This past Friday I took a road trip with our "hospitality enforcer," aka "big Mike," to pick up some chairs for BSM.  I had no idea it would be from such a beautiful old church.  I had also been unaware that this church recently closed, and with the Presbytery's approval, we could basically claim whatever we wanted from there for BSM.

As we we hauling chairs and tables out the back door to the rented Penske truck, a couple of young girls who lived down the road decided to say hello.  They were both between 4-6 years old I'd assume.  They were very curious as to what we were doing.  When I told them the story, she kept saying "i'm so sorry." She also explained that she used to go there to eat meals here and they hosted girl scouts among many other things for this impoverished area.  She kept apologizing to me as if this was my church, as if this closing was affecting me personally.

a prophet...

All year, I've been plugging away with church revitalization.  I've been working in two environments where church had basically "closed down."  I've had the unique opportunity of helping to create a new church environment for the 21st century without having to fight through the existing church cultures that exist in most places.  Being so caught up in this has left me unappreciative of the past, of the great history of churches, of the pain that comes with closing down.

The thought is that the more you look back, the more you'll be held back from charging forward with new ministry.  This is true to some extent.  However, where is the grace in this?  Where do we sympathize with our brothers and sisters whose ministry has failed?  Do we blame them?  Did they get what they deserved for not running an effective ministry?

I should be sorry...

Walking through a place that carried hopes and dreams of many many people is a sobering reality that reminds us how difficult it is to live faithfully as a church community.  Amidst all the work a church does, being in relationship with one another is at the core.  When a church closes, the opportunity for this closes.  We should seek ways to reach out to those who are losing their place of hope, whether it be a church community, a family, friends, etc...

In the meantime, I look forward greatly to the final couple months I have here at BSM, moving forward, hopefully in the direction of new ministry that serves the kingdom of God.  May the knowledge of the saints, the great cloud of witnesses, who have gone before guide us in this direction.  May we continue to be grateful.

BSM celebrates its 5th birthday today which is a HUGE deal.  They have survived this long as a radical new ministry and deserve to celebrate with those who have been there along the way.  Despite all the new things this place has brought, the sanctuary walls continue to peel, the ceiling continues to crumble, the building continues to deteriorate.  However, the walls still stand.  Those who have gone before us continue to support ministry in this place, even though they are long gone now.  May the ministry carry onward as the Spirit leads!

Happy Birthday Broad Street Ministry!

small crowd

If I told you that the lowest-attended worship service of the year at BSM was Mothers' Day, would you believe me?  Now I'm not sure if this is exactly true or not, but since I've been here at least, this was one of the lowest attended days of the year.

In other churches, the sunday after Easter may take this award.  For others, it's some day in June or July when people are on vacation.  However, BSM happens to be on Mothers' Day.  This is strange to me because I am used to the culture of Mothers' Day being the day you go to CHURCH and LUNCH with your mother/grandmother/aunts/etc., complete with cards and flowers.

Perhaps it was the evening service that made attendance so low.  Perhaps it is the fact that many of our usual attendees are young adults, most not yet mothers who were able to travel away for the weekend.  However, this doesn't quite explain the drop in our homeless guests, right?  Why would they have anywhere else to go?  Aren't they rejects that have no "home" to go to?

One thing I've learned a lot about from the guests we meet is that this stereotype is far from the truth.  Most of our guests have very large families in the city, whether it be their parents, their own children, or siblings, that love them very much.  Some may be isolated and alone, others may be alienated from these families, some may refuse to re-connect.  However, the absence of our guests from dinner tonight made me think that the connection of family is difficult to break, no matter what the circumstance.

Our guests go through trauma every day.  Being treated as sub-human will do this to you.  However, at the end of the day, they've got mothers or motherly figures out there to love and accept them.  This Sunday showed that this love is real and they are willing to make room to spend time with these families.  

Church is realized in these moments as well when you see who does show up for service.  They show up because they may be far away from family.  They may not have family.  They may see BSM as their family.  Either way, being in each other's presence is the true realization of the body of Christ.

Blessings on the love of Mothers and Motherly figures out there.
...and blessings on those without either in their lives, that they may find that love within community.

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Apologies for the long posting drought, I have them from time to time!  I p

I am working hard as usual at BSM/ASPC.  I will remain here through early August, doing most of the same work, with a few new opportunities that I will explain soon.  Broad Street Ministry will celebrate it's 5th birthday this upcoming Sunday, so we've got a lot to work on!